Reality Television

In general, I'm against it. I withdraw from entertainment that could be described as "cringe worthy." But when it comes to reality television, I have two exceptions to my rule:

1. Project Runway. I mean - have you seen it? It's genius. It never gets old. Any show with that much talent rocks the jam. Yes, these people are crazy and they are trying soooooo hard to create drama amongst their ranks in order to cross over from game show territory into reality show world. But, in the end, after a trip to what has GOT to be the most amazing fabric store in the free world (Mood - I want to go to there), and a whole lot of sewing, there's a super fabulous runway show. Who could ask for anything more? Well, there's something more.

There is currently a spin off from my beloved Project Runway which showcases a cadre of PR non-winners. I don't call them losers, because they won my heart the first time around, so they never really lost (Austin Scarlett - I love you and your crazy ass hats. Are you in a barbershop quartet? Are you going to a church as a black lady? So great....). And, even though this All Stars show does not feature Heidi Klum (so weird without her - and who else is heartbroken over her divorce from Seal? Come on!) nor does it feature Tim Gunn (how I adore thee), All Stars has something better.

Isaac. Mizrahi.

If you've never seen Unzipped, you should. If you've never watched Isaac talk about himself and bent collars and hushpuppy boots and fur hoodies and Eartha Kitt and Mary Tyler Moore and just whatever fabulous things pop into his brilliant, giant mind, you need to get on that. Or maybe not. I don't know. I just know that I love him. And he's on Project Runway All Stars giving his opinion, and it is GOLD. Isaac, y'all. Isaac.

2. The Kardashians Hot Mess of Reality Television. There are apparently several different shows that surround this freakish dynasty, but I honestly can't tell them apart other than in which city they are currently dwelling. Which is either LA, New York, or Miami. I'm led to understand that one of them will be moving to Texas soon, and you better believe that I will be watching. Well, kind of. I tend to watch it in bulk when they decide to show three or four shows in one night. And on that one night, I cannot look away.

Okay, so here's the thing. This is a clan of people who produce, create, and provide nothing of value for anyone. They loll about their embarrassingly huge mansions complaining about what can only be described as "white girl problems." There was an entire plot line where one sister brutally eviscerated another sister over being woken up on a day she wanted to sleep late. It was a multi-episode arc! So why can't I look away?

Well, maybe I'm fascinated to watch these beautiful women (I know it's hard to see - but they are gorgeous) who choose to alter their appearance with layers upon layers on make up and lip plumpers and fake eye lashes - on a NORMAL day. Fake eyelashes. Not for Halloween. Not for a fancy dress up occasion. For a Monday. And the boots - I think I witnessed three different pair of over the knee boots in one episode. The hand bags. The jewels - that famous one's engagement ring was the size of a mah jong tile. The nails, the monstrous hair. Does anyone know how long it takes to get those long flowing locks? They might look effortless and free form, but it takes a lot of product and tools to create that easy going hair.

And the homes these people live in. With some of the most beautiful pieces of furniture. If I walked into my bed room and regularly saw a king sized bed with a perfectly upholstered head board with nail head trim, I think I might smile a little bit bigger. I wouldn't be flopping around against it with my over processed hair (think Soul Glo from Coming to America, y'all).

Is it the life they live? Is it that they don't seem to work that hard for it? Is it that their idea of working is making appearances, choosing products to attach their names to, and talking excessively about NOOOOOTHING is all a recipe for television gold? I really don't know. But it is just one of those dirty little secrets of mine. I love it, I can't look away; I hate it, I can't look away.

That is all for now. I'm staying up too late on a school night once again....